When Church Hurts
It’s the issue that triggered the Archbishop of Canterbury’s resignation and will, undoubtedly, be the first item in the new pope’s in-tray. I am talking about spiritual abuse, the exploitation of position and power which damages people, plagues Christ’s church and taints our Christian witness. And it’s not just the global church’s institutions that are struggling to respond to the deluge of appalling disclosures. The exposure and fall of popular preachers read like a who’s-who of evangelical culture: Bill Hybels, Mike Pilavachi and Carl Lentz to name but three.
Systems that deny failings and/or protect the guilty are being exposed and, slowly safeguards are being put in place. However, that does not eliminate the human harm. Some of us have personal wounds to bear from injuries sustained in dysfunctional settings whilst others bear the burden for wounded friends. Meanwhile all of us, I suggest, face the collateral damage that arises from the failures of those we have respected and valued. We are left disappointed and conflicted about how to sort out the good and the bad from ministries that have inspired and informed us.
It’s essential that we acknowledge that systemic spiritual abuse is happening in the body of Christ and find ways to walk with and support the injured even as we seek justice. So, this Sunday in our “Live Issues” series we will be thinking about spiritual abuse and how we might respond. It’s a massive area and a sensitive issue so I trust that our brief reflection will be a helpful start.
Spiritual abuse is more than the personal and individual hurts that occur in all our relationships: it is something that becomes entangled with our processes of governance, our ways of leadership and even our theological views.
Rachel Clinton Chen helpfully describes Spiritual abuse as “a distortion and exploitation of spiritual authority to manipulate, control, use, or harm others, mostly through shame and fear.”
Jesus is pretty outspoken about the ways in which we can abuse religion to damage people in Matt 23. We will be looking at this on Sunday so you might wish to have a read beforehand.
There are a number of helpful articles and books covering this is issue. The March 25 issue of Christianity magazine has an article on abusive leadership.
https://www.premierchristianity.com/features/why-are-some-church-leaders-abusive-as-a-priest-and-psychotherapist-this-is-what-i-think-is-going-on/18985.article
I have found the following books to be helpful:
Healing Spiritual Abuse, Ken Blue,
A Church Called Tov, Scott McKnight,
Redeeming Power, Diane Langberg
When Narcissism comes to church, Chuck de Groat
and for podcast fans “the Rise and Fall of Mars Hill” makes salutary listening.
Light is a disinfectant and so simply bringing our stories into the open in a safe and confidential place can be truly healing. I would encourage you to find space to tell your story to a safe and gracious pair of ears.
You may want to find a good counsellor or spiritual director, pastor or friend. And may we together find the wisdom and grace to build healthy church communities.
Grace,
Iain